Let me confess: I’d be the first one to find something attractive about a child that has an opinion. One that knows what he wants and knows how to stand up for what they think is right. But there’s a thin line that separates this expressing of opinions from arguments. And there’s nothing sweet about a child who picks an argument with the family at the drop of a hat.
Is your little one turning into a messy pre-teen with every passing day? Has she been reacting arrogantly, disobeying instructions, and throwing a fit at the drop of a hat? If you nodded along in agreement, here’s a post that’s just for you. Here are 5 Effective Discipline Techniques for Your Pre-Teen.
Use If….Then Statements:
She’s old enough to understand the action-consequence relation, so start using ‘If…then’ statements that will outline the consequences of any unacceptable behavior. This will also help her learn self-discipline.
Rewards work wonders
Have a behavioral contract with your little one and reward her with extra privileges or gifts if she abides by those and is disciplined.
Be a role-model
She learns from what she sees. So make sure you lead a life that serves as a worthy role-model. Keep your calm even under stressful situations.
The calm approach
Make it a practice and an unwritten rule at home that things get done only when you’re calm. Also make sure you practice this and don’t lose your cool when she isn’t following any of the rules you’ve laid.
Did these tips help? Tell us what worked for you, in the comments section below. Share the blog with parents you think might need it!
Set an example and make your child understand that arguing will not get things done. Do not give in to any of their requests they make while they argue, to get across your point that she’d never get what she wants if he argues. And remember to never get into an argument with your child around because your child is bound to learn from your example.
Give your child options
Arguments happen when you force your child to do everything as you wish. So, give her an option even for the chores like, do you want to help me set the table for dinner, or take the trash out this week? Would you like to have fruits or biscuits for snack today, etc;
Be ready to hear out your child completely.
Be open to reconsidering a rule or a decision, when the decision seems like it was less than well-thought.
Have a steely determination to stick to your “NO” when you think it is important.
Differentiate between arguments and debate
A debate is about two people expressing their point of view about a subject, while an argument is about two people constantly trying to one-up each other. Make your child understand why you are ok with the child expressing his opinion, but not with picking a fight over issues. Help her understand the difference between an argument and a debate.
Tell them what’s acceptable
It is important that your child knows the right time to make a request. For instance, if your child requests to invite a friend to your family gathering in the presence of your friend, you are obliged to give in. So, make it clear to your child that any request needs to be made in private and at home.
Have the house rules
Set the rules for your house and make sure she understands and follows them. Keep it clear that contributing to the household chores is not a choice.
This blog post provides some valuable insights into disciplining pre-teens effectively, a task that many parents find challenging. The techniques discussed, like using ‘If…then’ statements and implementing a behavioral contract with rewards, are practical and grounded in understanding the action-consequence relationship, which is crucial for this age group. These methods encourage self-discipline and accountability, teaching children that their actions have direct impacts. It’s refreshing to see a focus on positive reinforcement rather than punitive measures, which can often lead to resistance rather than cooperation. Overall, this blog offers useful strategies for parents navigating the tricky waters of pre-teen discipline.